Lil Crazed Debuts a Visual for “Staring At Nothing” (Spoken Word)

In an interesting change of pace, Lil Crazed has decided to promote a spoken word piece, returning to his lyrical roots. It’s a harrowing tale of family struggle with the ominous visuals to match. This is part of a new mini-series that the KiD is working on, with new episodes debuting the first Wednesday of every month.

and here i am, yet again,
staring at nothing but a reflection,
the silence that’s in the air causes an annoying hum in my ear that’s almost too loud to bear, how ironic,
and the cold in the room consumed by my body is confused, how am i getting heated over here? how ironic,
i stand here contemplating what i’ve accomplished,
trying to process the contents of my life and the paths i’ve taken,
the frowns overshadowed by it’s upside down rival,
so the people that surrounds me are mistaken,
they think i’m happy, but the smile lies,
how can they hear if all my tears come from silent cries?
prior ties have been cut off, because of i,
now if you put “i” between prior ties, you get priorities, but i have none,
and that’s the same way i feel about my life, i don’t have one,
but things were different once upon a time,
my parents had a child and the son (sun) would shine
my father threw me softballs while i was hitting from the plate
my mother taught me manners while she placed dinner on the plate
life was great,
but then all of sudden things began to change,
instead of softballs, my father began throwing lamps,
lights flying, i felt like i was in a rave,
instead of manners, my mother used words like “fuck you” “piece of shit” and “damn!”
things i shouldn’t hear at my age,
words i was taught not to use were exchanged constantly,
and honestly, i was confused how something so promising evolved into something so demolishing,
the love between them started to depart farther and farther out
their arguments got worse, to the point they forgot what they were arguing about,
and as those increased, their love did the exact opposite,
they became another statistic of the divorce rate and did the obvious,
but it wasn’t so bad for them because they both started a new family,
and here i am, in between, forced to pursue happily,
my little half brother on my mom’s side is so cute and chubby,
my little half sister on my dad’s side is so amusing and bubbly,
but who am i? the forgotten child? damn that,
i’m the sole reason my parents have to remain in contact,
if and when i’m no longer in existence, the same would happen to their bond,
disappear, poof, gone,
fake smiles, they’ve got to put on whenever they get connected,
fake smiles, it must be genetics,
because i put on a fake smile just about everywhere i go,
just about everywhere except when i’m alone at home,
when i look into the mirror and see my reflection,
here i am, yet again, staring at nothing

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